How to say "Fuck You" in (almost) 100 different ways.

Here is a list of how to say Fuck You in many different countries/languages and where you can use them. Enjoy!

Yet (Thailand)

Vinaque (Fiji)

Hundir Pelos (Puerto Rico)

Culear (Chile)

Lech Tiezdayen (Israel)

Siktir Git (Turkey)

Dairich (Scottland)

Yet Meh (Malaysia)

Jodete (Venezuela)

Fai (Tonga)

Jebiga (Croatia)

Kunats Kez (Armenia)

Sha (Mongolia)

Otha (Tamil)

As To Thialo (Greece)

Druber Rutsche (Switzerland)

Sa Te Fut (Romania)

Kefe (Samoa)

Lo (Birmania)

El Cono De Tu Madre (Dominican Republic)

Rechuncha (Peru)

Kinka Wena (Sotho)

Dorme Mecum (Latin)

Pierdol Sie (Poland)

Faen Ta Deg (Norway)

Fuck Dig (Denmark)

Anda A Cagar (Argentina)

Zkurvysyn (Czech Republic)

Haista Vittu (Finland)

Fick Dich (Germany)

Drctities (Letonia)

Foda-se (Brazil)

Chimando (Guatemala)

Pisti (Lithuania)

Knulla Dig (Sweden)

Riddu Ter (Iceland)

Vete A Singar (Cuba)

Pishov Na Khuj (Ukraine)

Ku Gihen (Oriya - India)

Ebi Se (Bulgaria)

Jebem Ti Boga (Slovenia)

Kisama (Japan)

Foda-Se (Portugal)

Yoaasher (Arabic)

Neuk Jou (Holland)

Ma Teegy Aneekik (Egypt)

Chikne (Nepal)

Ci (Laos)

Ffwc (Wales)

F'oxx (Malta)

Slinokh (Syria)

Diu (Cantonese)

Pojeb sa! (Slovakia)

Zozoter (Haiti)

Ponchar (Panama)

Ssibal (Korea)

Fage (Shanghai)

Fotre (Catalonia)

Te Qifsha (Albania)

Keppima (Estonia)

Chodela (Hindi)

Jembem Ti (Serbia)

Shegetsi (Georgia)

Fuck You (English)

Defalouter (Mauritius)

Mit Kuze Ta Na (Kurdistan)

Javla (Sweden)

Cai Deo Gi Day (Vietnam)

Bualadh Craicinn (Ireland)

Vaffanculo (Italy)

Ngentot Loe (Indonesia)

Vas Te Faire Encule (France)

Gyurcasany Takarodj (Hungary)

Poshol Nahuj (Russia)

Was (Somalia)

Putz Di (Austria)

Da Ti Fo Fukne Konj (Macedonia)

Cao Ni (Mandarin)

Unfortunately, that is not quite 100. I hope to add more to the list when I can.

The spelling may be incorrect on a few, and the pronounciation may differ on some, but this is the general list.

How to Get Drunk Super Fast.

I've never tryed this but apparently it works.

If alchol is taken like a suppository then you will get drunk super fast. To insert alchol into your arse means that it gets absorbed directly into the blood stream. This skips the liver and stomach meaning that higher alchol content is retained and you can get smashed. Reports on the internet say that 2 beers is enough to leave you struggling to walk even after you take them out.

One thing to keep in mind though is that alchol is a poison which the liver breaks down. Since you skip the liver drinking this way you are putting yourself at a much higher risk of alchol poisoning.

I've never tryed this and doubt I will but I guess if your deperate and can only affort a couple beers, who knows?

Signed

C-Biz

How To Get Awesome

From the recently joined Facebook group, "I don't get drunk, i get awesome!".


" Getting Awesome" Involves the common term known as "binge drinking" though instead of getting drunk, you turn into something quite remarkable and admirable. People see how awesome you are at "TC"** or doing the "Spastic Robot"* and try to copy it to become awesome like you, but not as awesome.

Binge Drinking, the core term in this how to, involves drinking a large amount of alcohol in a small amount of time, to induce the influence of alcohol faster. Alcohol alters the chemicals of the brain affecting judgement,reaction times, inhibitions, the nervous system, and general normal control of the body. This can be a great thing or a horrible thing depending on who you are speaking to.

Please note there is a huge difference between Binge Drinking and Getting Awesome.

Binge Drinking and Getting Awesome start the same way, but become totally different things in my opinion.

Drunk Smile

Binge drinking is what most adolescents do on a friday/saturday night, to forget about their so called "dramas" and drink large amounts of beer, wine or spirits and let their inhibitions take over and ruin and/or make their night. This is all well and good, but really, wouldn't you rather tell someone about how awesome you got last night? Don't worry, i already know the answer to that.

Who's Awesome?

Getting Awesome, however, starts the same way, with anyone who is 18 or older "getting their drink on". Everything after this is completely different. Any dance moves you are performing become effortlessly complex and amazing,your confidence level goes through the roof, and you generally feel like Captain Awesome** and/or Barney Stinson***.

Tactical Chunder
The T.C. is performed when more drinking is required, and the stomach is full. This is an optional activity involved with Getting Awesome, but is not mandatory if you can hold your drink.

Stumbling
What may look like you stumbling to get somewhere during the night is an optical illusion. In reality, you are effortlessly gliding from one place to another, leaving behind a light trail of awesomeness.

Here are some pictures that may help you see what it is to get awesome.

Products for Binge Drinking

Vodka

Shots


Example of Getting Awesome:
Robot Dance

Robot Dance 2



References

*Coined by Blak-T, a good mate of mine(real name undisclosed). Much like the cool robot dance, only visually it may look retarded. Never been attempted.

** Tactical Chunder. A popular move practiced by binge drinkers to rid the body of booze, so one feels better and can continue binge drinking. Put simply, it involves tickling the Uvala(dangly bit) at the back of your mouth until your gag reflex takes over, or just pretending you are bulimic.

** Captain Awesome from the tv series Chuck.

*** Barney Stinson from the popular sitcom, How I Met Your Mother. Played by Neil Patrick Harris.


by gilly11

How to Drink Girly Drinks Without Looking Gay.

There are a couple of ways to drink girly drinks and not look gay.

a) Drink Fast.

If the bottle is consumed in under 30 seconds, its not gay. Obviously shorter times are better and more masculin. I suggest the use of a bendy straw or beer bong to decrease drinking times.

b) Change the container.

If your drinking a cruiser out of non-see through cup, no one will ever know. Alternatively if you tip it into a Woodstock can, masculinity will actually increase.

c) Stop fondling your mates balls while drinking them.

This should probably apply to all drinks, not just girly ones.

d) Just don't drink them.

Theres a reason your worried about looking gay while drinking them and thats because you dream of plowing your mate!


Signed

C-Biz
C-Biz Says...

How to download using Torrents

Today were going to be discussing torrents, what they are and how to use them to get what you want without any of the nasties. Allot of people dont know exactly how to download using torrents but probably have friends who use them all the time, so stop pestering them for the latest episode of your favorite show and read this "How to"!

What is a Torrent?
A Torrent is a very small file (just few kilobytes (very small)) with the extension of .torrent, which contains all the information needed to download a file the torrent was made for. You can get torrents for almost anything including software, games, music or videos.

How do they work?
You dont need to know much about how they work, just they they do. But in simplified terms: Imagine you had a light globe (your PC or Mac), a small battery (the computer your downloading from) and some wire to make a circuit (the wire would be torrent).

When you connect the light to the battery with the wire the light will shine but not very brightly. The more batteries you have the brighter the light shines. So, the more computers your downloading from (ie. batteries), the faster it goes. These are called seeds.

How to get started
FIRST:
First thing you need to do is download some free software that can interpret the information that comes with torrent you download. These programs are called Bittorrents. I recommend uTorrent because it works on PC and Mac, its easy to use and understand, but most importantly its FREE!

SECOND:
Once you have uTorrent installed, we can start searching for torrents that you would like to download. There are allot of sites out there and their relativley easy to find if you google it, but i recommend The Pirate Bay for starters.

On The Pirate Bay you can either search or brows for the torrent you want. Once you have found it, click "Download". This will cause a window to pop up (on a PC). You can either set it to open in uTorrent or save it on you computer somewhere.

Note:
What you should be looking for is obviously the torrent you want, but also try and find one with as many seeds (SE) as possible because this will make the download go faster. Also, try and find one with at least a few comments and have a bit of a read about what people say - they generally give you a good idea of the quality and the rest of it but most importantly will let you know if its got a virus attached to the file your downloading. Just because the description said "How i met your mother season 3 episode 5" wont mean that its a virus in disguise.

THIRD:
If you set the file to open in uTorrent by default (which i recommend) then uTorrent will open up and another window will open asking for confirmation. Just click "Ok".

If you haven't set it to open up automatically, then all you have to do is open uTorrent then click: File > Add Torrent... > then locate the torrent file and click "Open". Click "Ok" on the window that pops open and it will start downloading.

FORTH:
Sit back n watch it download!

I hope that helps out a few people. If you have anything further to add to what ive said feel free to comment. Happy downloading!

"By reading this next blog you agree that this information is simply used for entertainment/informative purposes and should not be tried by anyone. We here at How To Blooog do not encourage anyone to try this and we will not be held responisble for those that do."

How to Make an Easy Dinner Look Impressive.

When I'm cooking a dinner to impress some one I use a couple rules to make sure that the dinner looks amazing even though I have pretty limited skill at it.

Rule 1. Variety

By putting a variety of food on the plate. It pulls attention away from each individual part. You look at the plate as a whole not as each easy to cook part.

Rule 2. Colour

By using colour you can really spice up a plate. Aim to have 3 different colours. An easy way to do this is with placing a base of baby spinach under the main meal. This easily adds green to the dish and all the preparation needed is to buy the stuff from the supermarket.

Rule 3. Plating Up

Like what they say on every Masterchef episode plating up is important. If you make the meal look attractive the person your trying to impress will be more likely to like it.

Rule 4. Don't Try Something New

For the main part of the meal use something you cook often. It might be spiced chicken wings or steak. This is the only part of the meal where it needs to taste nice so don't experiment do something you know how to do and do it well.

Signed

C-Biz
www.c-biz-says.blogspot.com

How to decrease pain without drugs or medicine

Another quick one to tide you folks over.

Recently, researchers at Oxford University announced the discovery of a powerful new painkiller: Inverted Binoculars.

The scientists found that subjects who looked at a wounded hand through the wrong end of binoculars (making the hand appear smaller) felt significantly less pain and even experienced decreased swelling.

According to the researchers, this demonstrates that even basic bodily sensations such as pain are modulated by what we see.

So next time you stub your toe or cut your finger, do yourself a favour: look away!

Stay tuned! Some big How To's coming up soon!

How to suicide the quick and painless way

"By reading this next blog you agree that this information is simply used for entertainment/informative purposes and should not be tried by anyone. We here at How To Blooog do not encourage anyone to try this and we will not be held responisble for those that do."

My apologies for not getting a blog up sooner. I am working on a big one that I thought would be ready by now but isn't. So here's a quick one:

How to Suicide* the quick and painless way.

First things first, you need to get your hands on some Potassium Cyanide. This can be obtained from most jewellers. Just tell them you need it for restoring a gold ring.

Take a gram of this and mix it with 4 to 8oz of water. Wait 5 minutes, then drink.

You will then have roughly 15 to 45 until your body goes unconscious (laying down and thinking your final thoughts may be a good idea). Presuming no one finds you and calls an ambulance, you will be dead within 20-45 minutes.

It should also be noted that if you dispose of the glass/cup you drank from, it will seem like you died (peacefully) of natural causes.

This is painless and quite quick.

"Again, we do not recommend anyone use this information for anything other than entertainment or general knowledge."

How to Tell if a Girls Boobs are Saggy BEFORE They Take Their Clothes Off

This trick deals with the elasticity of boobs. The higher the elasticity, the higher the breasts sit when not supported by a bra.

So how to you check the elasticity when they are in a bra? Watch the bounce of the boobs. If they bounce allot they're going to be perkier. If they tend to stay still they're going to be saggier.

Test it out. It works.

Signed

C-Biz
www.c-biz-says.blogspot.com